automatic abs: a lesson in living

I've recently joined a gym... 

   O.K. Now that we've gotten the giggles out of the way. I've recently joined a gym and have started a regular workout routine. I spend at least three to four hours a week running and working out. It's a great place to meditate and ruminate on whatever. An added bonus is that I get to keep my manorexic physique for a few more years.

   I just read a workout tip for "automatic abs" and "the perfect six pack." (Go on and giggle then come back.) The advice given did not include tips on exercises to do and diet was only hinted at. The "six pack" advice I will pass on as life advice. It was to "concentrate on specific actions instead of the desired result."

   "Ripped abs" are nothing but a pipe dream to many. Fashion magazines are depressing after looking in the mirror. So why bother... have a greasy burger and say yes to the second helping of cheesecake. 

   I know how it feels. When I look in the mirror, the man that I want to be is so far away. The goals that I have set seem impossible. Saying yes to junk food and wanting to give up is the easy solution. Maybe after a while looking into mirrors will get easier. As of right now it is not. 

   This is what I will do, focus on the journey and concentrate on specific actions. There are loose ends in my life that need to tied up. Schooling is a major part. I'm going to stop thinking degrees, stop thinking g.p.a. I'm going to stop thinking finals when I should be thinking midterm. During this term and the terms after, my focus will be on tonight's homework, tomorrow's quiz, the current project. 

   I already feel a heavy weight lifted off my shoulders. That is just school. I'll think of  other ways to apply automatic ab advice to my everyday life while I'm on the treadmill. Go on, giggle.   

hugs

On my walk to the video store, a young lady walking ahead of me was having a heated discussion on the telephone. Respecting privacy is a big issue for me, but attempting to ignore the phone drama was impossible as the young lady took the the convo from the parking lot indoors and roamed the aisles aimlessly, at times shouting into the cellphone. She made known to everyone in the store through a brilliant monologue that she was in a long distance relationship, that she was not secure in the said relationship, and has "options" if the said relationship was to come to an abrupt end. Then she brought up a subject that will clear the room every time...she said she was lonely. 

   Here I was on a lonely afternoon browsing the video store for a rental. My heart six thousand miles away. Slowly the rage and annoyance faded away and I started to see myself yelling into a cellphone. A few minutes earlier I imagined myself walking up to her, grabbing the cellphone, flipping it shut and tossing it across the room (as the fellow patrons cheer and clap). The image changed into me walking up and giving Miss shall we call her cellphone faux pas(?) a big, big hug. Not because I thought that she really needed it...because just then, at that exact moment I really needed it. 

selfish

I think too much about other people. This is my fatal flaw. I need to be more selfish. I need to think about myself more.

"i don't really like talking about my flair."

It happens much too often. It happens whenever my mouth starts working. Next thing you know I've went on and on and on, and a perfectly good conversation has been ruined. Please do not let me do it here. If I ever whine about work...please, kick me.

Thank you.